Just Another Day in Paradise.

Another month has flown by and all I have to show for it is a messy house, a bruised up baby, a tired husband and a baby bump. Sometimes I feel like life is flashing before my eyes and I don't have a minute to soak it up or enjoy it. I guess that is why I look forward to "rock a baby time" which is our term for rocking Karson to sleep. For just a short 20 minutes a day, well 40 because of nap time, I sit in absolute silence and reflect. I sit there and absorb the love I have for my child and for my life. For those short minutes I am not thinking about my to-do list: getting ready for Karson's first birthday, finally making it to the store to complete my shopping list, going to work, figuring out when I am going to study...it goes on and on, you get the point. Often I find myself talking out loud sharing hopes and dreams I have for Karson's future. Now that the hormone swings are in full effect I cry, I just sit in the dimly lit room and cry tears of pure joy. The kind of joy you only get when you look down at your sleeping child and think to yourself, "I never thought I could possess this sort of love for another person." And in the next thought I realize that in a few short months I will have another little person to share those feelings for.

This time around pregnancy has been much more relaxing, probably because I have plenty to keep me busy or maybe because I don't have the fear of the unknown. When I was pregnant the first time, every little pain I thought something was wrong. In the beginning of pregnancy number two I was a little nervous, there was some cause for concern, but now I am at ease, at peace. The only worry I have about having a second baby is thinking how can I love a second person as much as I do Karson? My mother, who had three children assures me that I will have enough love. I will love them the same amount, but differently because they will be different people and we will have different relationships. Which leads me to the much debated question do parent's have a favorite child? Obviously, I am the favorite. Haha! All I know is that Karson will always be my first child and we will always have a special bond from that. We share the first pains of labor and c-section, breastfeeding failures, sleepless nights, crying spells, poopy diapers, pure bliss and complete fear. I am excited that I will have a little knowledge going into this pregnancy and baby. Seems like having done this before Kurt is also at ease, which helps a lot.

We will be celebrating Karson's first birthday in a week. Our little baby is a big boy who is starting to walk. We can't believe how fast the year has gone. Watching Karson grow has been one the most beautiful journeys I have been apart of. Every day he grows leaps and bounds, making progress and impressing Mommy and Daddy. Its amazing to see how much Karson has learned. Every morning after I shower, I sit on the floor in front of him and blow dry my hair. The other day he went into the drawer, pulled out the blow dryer and went to plug the blow dryer in and turned it on. He saw me do this routine maybe three times and he was able to repeat me. It blew my mind. Of course we have plug protectors. You can see his little brain working in overdrive to absorb everything he can. After watching Kurt play the guitar a couple times, he now sits and strums the guitar every night with his father. We have our hands full. He is smart, but sometimes too smart! Kurt & I find ourselves saying NO! way more than we should for a baby who is only one year old. We are learning our way of re-directing and using positive reinforcement. This is when the real parenting starts....oh boy!

Goodbye 2012.

Another year has come and gone. I can't believe this time last year I was absolutely huge and about ready to burst. I look back at the pictures and cringe; I was so exhausted and ready to give birth. And now here we are, with another baby on the way and a extremely active 11 month old who keeps us on our tippy toes. December completely got away from me this year. I was so immersed in trying to finish my most challenging semester to date, consumed with celebrating birthdays and other family/friend festivities all while trying to keep my cookies down, literally. All in all I believe Karson's first Christmas was a success; I know it was very trying for both Kurt and myself. We really just went overboard with trying to be the best party hosts and attempting to make lasting memories for Karson. I believe we were successful and it was worth it to see our family together. Next year I promised Kurt not as much running around. This promise should be easy since my job won't allow me to have another Christmas off for three years. (Could be a blessing or a curse, depends how you look at it). Unfortunately, my first trimester pukes decided to hit me in the middle of the Christmas holiday. I wasn't able to partake in the annual food feast; I couldn't even stomach the majority of the smells. Kurt and I were surprised how fast it actually happened. Guess the oven was pre-heated still. We thought we would at least get through the holidays. The big man upstairs has different plans for the Mundell clan. Regardless, I put a smile on and we got through the holidays and I am counting down the days until the second trimester. (And for those of you who are thinking, I hate to tell her but she might be sick the entire pregnancy, curse you)! Karson wouldn't mind, he thinks the sound I make while getting sick is absolutely hysterical. Glad someone is smiling. Minus the sickness, we are ecstatic to be adding another little monster to the family. What a wild ride this is gonna be. 

When we found out this time we were pregnant, it was after taking about four tests. Kurt swore up and down I was pregnant. I didn't believe it, things hadn't gotten back on schedule and I could have just been late. So I decided to take a test, and then another and another. All came back negative and I kept telling Kurt, "I told you so, you don't know what you are talking about." At the same time I was battling a mysterious fat bulge that had taken residence on my abdomen. My pants were tighter and my skinny jeans were not looking skinny. Even my wonderful mother told me on numerous occasions, "tuck your pooch in, your fat is hanging over your pants." One morning, Karson woke me up by doing his usual pushups on my stomach, except this time he missed and 22 lbs landed directly onto my chest, I just about died and did everything to fight my reflexes of throwing him off of me. Okay, by this time maybe I was thinking I might be pregnant. It was just too early to tell. Finally, I stopped buying the tests and decided to let time take its course. I waited about a week and on a Friday evening I decided to try it again, it was positive and I was still sort of shocked. I walked out of the bathroom and the boys were sitting in the bed, Karson immediately smiled, he must have known (or he was just smiling because I came out of the door, he loves when people come out of doors or showers). 

The next day I was scheming of a way to tell my mom. I was so freaked out when I found out I was pregnant with Karson I called her right away on the phone and screamed I was pregnant. She was the one who said I was in the first place and that I should take a test. Mother knows best. This time around, she had her suspicions; I couldn't hide the belly bulge. Karson and I went shopping with my close friends Saturday morning and I was on the hunt for a big brother shirt. I dragged the girls and Karson all around the mall on this mission, except I didn't want to tell them what I was looking for; I wanted to surprise them too. Finally we made it into Old Navy and there was our needle in a haystack. I learned that they don't have big brother shirts in Karson's size. Guess not enough people are crazy to have kids that close in age. Regardless, I held up the girls to show the shirt and both of them just looked at me. Blank. Eventually with a little explanation they got it. That night we had plans for a work Christmas party and decided to drop Karson off to my mom's with his new shirt on. After about ten minutes of her fluttering around, she came into the living room and without hesitation wanted to know why Karson did not have his bib on (this kid STILL drools like crazy). She got it pretty fast, C-pops though took a long time. We shared the news with our immediate family and decided to sit on it to share with everyone for a bit longer. 

Of course we had to have a scary moment (wouldn't be us if not). One night I was getting dressed for work, the boys were sleeping. I went to the bathroom and when I got up there was blood, not a lot but enough to be scared. I woke Kurt up and told him, I knew it wasn't good. Kurt was surprisingly very calm. I went to work that night scared to death that the worst was happening. I of course googled too much information and completely freaked myself out. I made it through the night, no more blood. I had cramping, which was new to me, but it eventually subsided. We made it to the doctor and got the confirmation. She ordered a sonogram to check on the status. As of 12/20 we saw our baby and heard his/her heartbeat. It was a completely different sensation than Karson. With him I had no idea what I was getting myself into, I felt no connection as a mother. This time I know what it feels like to be a mom, the most challenging and rewarding experience in life. I fell in love in that moment with a baby who was no bigger than one centimeter and that love grows every day. 219 days to go, but who is counting?

I don't normally make New Year resolutions, but last year I made a a plan to make this blog and continue with it throughout the year. Success! Karson's resolution is to sleep in his crib by himself. My resolution is to not give into him. I need strength and the grace of God. Lord help us all. Cheers to another year of learning and growing. 

Cheese Face!