Just Another Day in Paradise.

Another month has flown by and all I have to show for it is a messy house, a bruised up baby, a tired husband and a baby bump. Sometimes I feel like life is flashing before my eyes and I don't have a minute to soak it up or enjoy it. I guess that is why I look forward to "rock a baby time" which is our term for rocking Karson to sleep. For just a short 20 minutes a day, well 40 because of nap time, I sit in absolute silence and reflect. I sit there and absorb the love I have for my child and for my life. For those short minutes I am not thinking about my to-do list: getting ready for Karson's first birthday, finally making it to the store to complete my shopping list, going to work, figuring out when I am going to study...it goes on and on, you get the point. Often I find myself talking out loud sharing hopes and dreams I have for Karson's future. Now that the hormone swings are in full effect I cry, I just sit in the dimly lit room and cry tears of pure joy. The kind of joy you only get when you look down at your sleeping child and think to yourself, "I never thought I could possess this sort of love for another person." And in the next thought I realize that in a few short months I will have another little person to share those feelings for.

This time around pregnancy has been much more relaxing, probably because I have plenty to keep me busy or maybe because I don't have the fear of the unknown. When I was pregnant the first time, every little pain I thought something was wrong. In the beginning of pregnancy number two I was a little nervous, there was some cause for concern, but now I am at ease, at peace. The only worry I have about having a second baby is thinking how can I love a second person as much as I do Karson? My mother, who had three children assures me that I will have enough love. I will love them the same amount, but differently because they will be different people and we will have different relationships. Which leads me to the much debated question do parent's have a favorite child? Obviously, I am the favorite. Haha! All I know is that Karson will always be my first child and we will always have a special bond from that. We share the first pains of labor and c-section, breastfeeding failures, sleepless nights, crying spells, poopy diapers, pure bliss and complete fear. I am excited that I will have a little knowledge going into this pregnancy and baby. Seems like having done this before Kurt is also at ease, which helps a lot.

We will be celebrating Karson's first birthday in a week. Our little baby is a big boy who is starting to walk. We can't believe how fast the year has gone. Watching Karson grow has been one the most beautiful journeys I have been apart of. Every day he grows leaps and bounds, making progress and impressing Mommy and Daddy. Its amazing to see how much Karson has learned. Every morning after I shower, I sit on the floor in front of him and blow dry my hair. The other day he went into the drawer, pulled out the blow dryer and went to plug the blow dryer in and turned it on. He saw me do this routine maybe three times and he was able to repeat me. It blew my mind. Of course we have plug protectors. You can see his little brain working in overdrive to absorb everything he can. After watching Kurt play the guitar a couple times, he now sits and strums the guitar every night with his father. We have our hands full. He is smart, but sometimes too smart! Kurt & I find ourselves saying NO! way more than we should for a baby who is only one year old. We are learning our way of re-directing and using positive reinforcement. This is when the real parenting starts....oh boy!